“Say something,” Lauren whispered.
“Yes,” I said.
She looked at me. “You’re putting the whole family in danger because of this.”
“No,” I said. “I’m blowing the fuses.”
Eric, who had remained silent all evening, finally spoke. “Were these payments really from Amelia’s accounts?” He looked at Lauren. “I thought your mother helped with childcare.”
Lauren’s face tightened, not with guilt per se, but with panic. She hadn’t expected collateral damage. She certainly hadn’t expected her husband to learn the truth here.
“Eric, not now,” she said.
He didn’t look away. “How long?”
She did not reply.
This silence has done more harm than anything I could have said.
My mother stood up and changed tactics. “Amelia, this is a family matter. It doesn’t need an audience.”
I almost smiled. “You created an audience by ridiculing me.”
Her lips tightened. “You’ve always been sensitive.”
“There,” I said softly. “Hurt me, then accuse me of bleeding too much.”
For the first time that night, she did not react.
Lauren began to cry – real tears, or at least convincing ones. “I know what we said was awful. I know. But you can’t understand how difficult this has been.”
“I fully understand how difficult things have been,” I said. “I paid the price.”
Eric stood up. “Boys, put on your coats.” His calm voice made it all the more difficult. He led them towards the exit while Lauren wiped her face.
Daniel came back from the corridor, annoyed that no one had followed him. “You know what? Fine. Keep your money. Don’t call us if you find yourself alone.”
That one touched me because it was meant to. They all knew my worst fear. Our father left when I was eleven, and for years I bought love like insurance, hoping the payments would protect me.
I walked towards the door and opened it.
“I was alone,” I said. “I was just expensive.”
At first, nobody moved.
